Hoboken Special On The House!

Yeppity-yeppers, it's that time again! Let's shoot another poetry bubbly from the south to ring in this fine summer splashdown! And please be careful when you coast head-first on that Slip 'N Slide, I've had some unfortunate mat rashes, LOL! :)



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Soda Jerk (Give Me Something Refreshing)
By: Noah Eaton
6/18/06

Hey, Mr. Soda Jerk,
what’s buzzin’, cuzzin?

(Ah, hey there, Gunther Toody,
and what can I get for you today?)

(Dr. Brown’s Cel-Ray, Pops,
and keep ‘em comin’!)
.
.
.
Give me something refreshing,
give me something great,
give me something refreshing,
to quench me this hot summer day!
Give me something refreshing,
give me something with ice,
give me something refreshing,
that’ll leave me kickin’ on cloud nine!

Hey, Mr. Soda Jerk,
what’s you tale, nightingale,
fix me something,
that’ll make my taste buds wail!
(Illuminate me with your illuminations!)
Puts in time and a half with a belly laugh,
makes music shakin’ each carafe,
just rev up that fountain jet,
and use your imagination!



Give me something refreshing,
give me something great,
give me something refreshing,
to quench me this hot summer day!
Give me something refreshing,
give me something with ice,
give me something refreshing,
that’ll leave me kickin’ on cloud nine!

Watch him work that ice maker,
just like a high school paper maker,
he’s got more stamina,
than a thousand pledge takers!
Watch him work that ice maker,
just like a high school paper maker,
he’s got more stamina,
than a thousand pledge takers!)

Hey, Mr. Soda Jerk,
what’s you tale, nightingale,
fix me something,
that’ll make my taste buds wail!
(Go ahead and razz my berries!)
I’ve got a hot date,
at a quarter to eight,
and I’ve got a bent eight,
that’s got me made in the shade!
(Top this bash with a maraschino cherry!)



Give me something refreshing,
give me something great,
give me something refreshing,
to quench me this hot summer day!
Give me something refreshing,
give me something with ice,
give me something refreshing,
that’ll leave me kickin’ on cloud nine!

(Make it smooth and sturdy,
rich like Richie Rich,
sweet like sugarcane,
mild like Milo & Otis…)
.
.
.
Got any tonics,
that’ll send my tongue down the conga line,
how about a sample,
of Pink Love Potion #9,
or something to agitate the gravel,
make me a souped up goof,
maybe a longneck,
of Siberian sun ginseng brew,
in fact I’m feelin’ a bit outlandish,
can you make a brussel sprouts smoothie,
Ciscoe the TV gardener said if I eat ‘em,
I’ll be as handsome a stud as yours truly,
How about a Purple Yam malt,
or a Turkey & Gravy-flavored potation,
maybe a Kim-Chee infusion,
or a Wild Atlantic Salmon temptation?



(Let me show you how the Soda Jerk does it,
belly up to the bar!)

First, we’re gonna twist it, choke it like that,
twist it, choke it like this,
and then make it crackle out loud,
righto, we’re gonna twist it, choke it,
make it crackle out loud,
split one, shoot it yellow,
shoot one from the south.
We’re gonna twist it, choke it like that,
twist it, choke it like this,
and then make it crackle out loud,
righto, we’re gonna twist it, choke it,
make it crackle out loud,
split one, shoot it yellow,
shoot one from the south!

Watch him work that ice maker,
just like a high school paper maker,
he’s got more stamina,
than a thousand pledge takers!
Watch him work that ice maker,
just like a high school paper maker,
he’s got more stamina,
than a thousand pledge takers!)

(Good luck, kid,
I hope your date is a blast,
don’t forget your mirror warmer,
wow, that sure brings me back…

…how about my Hoboken Special for the road?)


Give me something refreshing,
give me something great,
give me something refreshing,
to quench me this hot summer day!
Give me something refreshing,
give me something with ice,
give me something refreshing,
that’ll leave me kickin’ on cloud nine!
.
.
.
(ding ding ding)
.
.
.
(Hey, Soda Jerk,
what’s the word from the bird?)

(Goin’ steady, buddy,
how ‘bout a Dusty Miller?)

(Thanks, Pops,
and keep ‘em comin’!)

***



***

Summer Always Answers Prayers Best
By: Noah Eaton
6/19/06

Today I walked along the boardwalk,
and I imagined you were here with me,
an hour before dawn kissed the summer sky,
checking out whatever seemed interesting,
you were like my maiden of the mist,
the starry surprise of your eyes made me swoon,
and right before I could feel your pristine kiss,
I’m left trying to preserve the glow of this honeymoon.

And I know,
I can feel,
your heart song momentarily,
and through all these winters,
I’ve found there’s an invincible summer,
chanting inside of me…

I believe summer always answers prayers best,
searching the seasons wildly on love’s quest,
there’s a feeling I have only fireflies can express,
when you leave nothing but tulip beds,
and golden threads in my head...

There’s something about the mystery of summer,
that makes you suffer but enjoy it immensely,
my heart beats thunderously chasing you around,
with sensitive eyes searching densely and intensely,
like a ladybug that lands on my shoulder,
you’re like a sweetest memory I’ve yet to understand,
fulfilling the promise of dozens of months past,
with the touch of your gentle hand...

And I know,
I can feel,
your heart song momentarily,
and through all these winters,
I’ve found there’s an invincible summer,
chanting inside of me...

I believe summer always answers prayers best,
searching the seasons wildly on love’s quest,
there’s a feeling I have only fireflies can express,
when you leave nothing but tulip beds,
and golden threads in my head...
.
.
.
.
.
.
And I know,
I can feel,
your heart song momentarily,
and through all these winters,
I’ve found you're an invincible summer,
chanting inside of me...

I believe summer always answers prayers best,
searching the seasons wildly on love’s quest,
there’s a feeling I have only fireflies can express,
when you leave nothing but tulip beds,
and golden threads in my head...

***



***

Alchemy Hour
By: Noah Eaton
6/15/06

*

Woahhhhhh, salty sister,
dawn patrol is beckonin’,
what’d you say we go shreddin’ the gnarl?

(Ahhhhhh, that’d be epic,
but,
all I got is this Woody Parsnip,
and I don’t want to look all Squarepants Spongekook!)

Awww shibby!
No worries, ya crippler chick,
today’s too coolaphonic to get chode burn!
Here, borrow my grom board,
I’m kinduva necter canvas commando myself!

(Really?
Wow, this is Gnarmax!)

Righteous,
let’s hit the fall line, beach bunny,
alchemy hour awaits...
.
.
.
.
.
I’ve gotten all proned out,
chasing the mare’s tail upon the glory trail,
I’m a fresh gale on the third rail,
that’s never ready to flail,
I’m a pastrami of a swami,
all soaked and I’m stoked,
nothin’ like an expression session,
to invoke that ancillary stroke…

I should have worn my rashie today,
cause I’m totally Burnt Reynolds,
the summer sun’s blazin’ white gold,
the Nectar of the Gods is drippin’ uncontrolled,
some say I possess some fourth power,
rippin’ lips in these rainbow showers,
and I tell my crew it’s all about attitude,
cuz this is a magic moment we call,
alchemy hour…
.
.
.
I behave like a stavewave,
engraved to the ragin’ riptide,
babelinis think I’m a hoot in my spring suit,
while quantum leapin’ the pipeline,
I’ve been over the falls,
I make them look notorious,
shreddin’ through Orbitsville,
into downtown Flushopolis.

I should have worn my rashie today,
cause I’m totally Burnt Reynolds,
the summer sun’s blazin’ white gold,
the Nectar of the Gods is drippin’ uncontrolled,
some say I possess some fourth power,
rippin’ lips in these rainbow showers,
and I tell my crew it’s all about attitude,
cuz this is a magic moment we call,
alchemy hour…
.
.
.
.
.
Come on in, lil’ dally,
forehand through this oceanic rift valley,
eskimo rollin’ and cajolin’,
through this tubular skittle alley,
the soul kiss of the solstice,
is my kind of sabbatical,
inside the pope’s living room,
born a church of the open sky fanatical.

I should have worn my rashie today,
cause I’m totally Burnt Reynolds,
the summer sun’s blazin’ white gold,
the Nectar of the Gods is drippin’ uncontrolled,
some say I possess some fourth power,
rippin’ lips in these rainbow showers,
and I tell my crew it’s all about attitude,
cuz this is a magic moment we call,
alchemy hour…
.
.
.
(Thanks a zipload,
that was haggard!)

Hey, ciara,
wanna head over to the Thursday Night Surf Club,
and catch some grub?

(Wow, dat’s da mamie, Gandelf!)

***



***

Cosmologicicle
By: Noah Eaton
5/23/06

Herschel Circinus is a space cowboy aerobatic,
a dreamer to the manner born, cream gravy idiomatic,
chooses not to see the world as monochromatic,
floating above the clouds a gospel sharp cinematic,
looks like everything’s in apple pie order,
penetrating the cosmos as a spaceship boarder,
bungee launching on course to Sadalachbia Stadium,
tanning in lunar hot springs till his cheeks gleam like palladium,
snowbird of space, silver-surfing footloose,
barrel rolling between the uplink and the abstruse,
having a delicate flair for some solar flare,
leisure wear made exclusive out of thin air,
space scout, may I have a readout,
riding shank’s mare can make you a devout,
rebounding from the black hole to the bean sprout,
hey, kid, what’d you got to lark about.

I know this universe is too diverse,
time too precious to waste and stickle,
so stick out your tongue,
and taste a dripping of this cosmologicicle.
I know its flavor keeps changing,
from each velvety trickle,
so stick out your tongue,
and taste a dripping of this cosmologicicle.

Namby-pamby Bambi’s off on a yellow rocket,
deep into the outer limits’ dry socket,
sweet surrender from the modus operandi,
this intergalactic inner-tube should come in handy,
howling like Serendipity Dog, fruit-batting like Metal Mickey,
snorkeling in the Orion Nebula where it’s always sticky,
hop aboard a Unicorpian to travel the red deserts of Mars,
fly to Dwingeloo to meet Pegasus Dwarve superstars.

I know this universe is too diverse,
time too precious to waste and stickle,
so stick out your tongue,
and taste a dripping of this cosmologicicle.
I know its flavor keeps changing,
from each velvety trickle,
so stick out your tongue,
and taste a dripping of this cosmologicicle.

Have a taste of Centauri Inari,
with a splash of Mu Cephei’s Red Dwarf Tamari,
follow me into the Tarantula Nebula on an epic safari,
park in the Crab Nebula for some of Yesh Yesh Winks’s calamari,
peddling our telescopomobiles by the solar cycle,
and may I remind you not to forget to solar recycle,
from where we’ve been, there’s no final destination,
all you believe is destined not to be simulation.

I know this universe is too diverse,
time too precious to waste and stickle,
so stick out your tongue,
and taste a dripping of this cosmologicicle.
I know its flavor keeps changing,
from each velvety trickle,
so stick out your tongue,
and taste a dripping of this cosmologicicle...

Hang on if you wanna tag along...

***



***

XOXO,
Noah Eaton
(Mistletoe Angel)
(Emmanuel Endorphin)