Violent Ecstasy In A Waffle Cone Zoot Suit

Freeze this date on your calendar and lick it! Yepper-doodle-dandy, you guessed it.....Ben & Jerry's is celebrating its drool-inducing 28th Annual Free Cone Day jubilation tomorrow from noon to 8 P.M! :) Last year over one million free samples were given away, both in cone or bowl, in every high-falootin' toute-frooozen flavor across their luscious kitchen from the Marsha Marsha Marshmallow to the Gobfather...The Flavor You Can't Refuse!



Golly gee, as Heywood Campbell Brown insisted, "I doubt whether the world holds for anyone a more soul-stirring surprise than the first adventure with ice cream." I only learned just ten minutes ago that Ben & Jerry's fans can get in line as many times as they want (and here I was these past few years leaving my thighs parched of cholestrol like a sucker, LOL!) Yep, those globbety-goopy goobers will be offering generous 4 ounce scoops (measuring three inches across), which one million servings of that gunky downhome goodness equals 250,000 pounds or 125 tons. In fact, did you know that all of the Free Cone Day scoops piled one on top of the other would scrape the sky at 250,000 feet, equivalent to approximately 200 times taller than the Empire State Building?



Not only do I savor Ben & Jerry's scrumptious, ineluctable flavors on any given day.....I also highly respect Ben & Jerry's for their company values. Their mission statwment is progressive-minded and is made up of three interrelated parts. Their Product Mission is "to make, distribute & sell the finest quality all natural ice cream & euphoric concoctions with a continued commitment to incorporating wholesome, natural ingredients and promoting business practices that respect the Earth and the Environment." Their Economic Mission is "to operate the Company on a sustainable financial basis of profitable growth, increasing value for our stakeholders & expanding opportunities for development and career growth for our employees." And finally, their Social Mission is "to operate the company in a way that actively recognizes the central role that business plays in society by initiating innovative ways to improve the quality of life locally, nationally & internationally."



They recognize as I do that the gap between the rich and the poor is wider than at anytime since the 1920's, and they work to generate these economic opportunities for those who have been denied them and see to it they are sustainable. They make their products with no environmental degradation and respect for local farms and rural communities. And they also believe in respect and nonviolence to make peace and justice possible, believing the government should work to strengthen human needs than to produce mass weapons systems. Their 50 Ways To Promote Peace mission on their official web-site is one I adhere and breathe every single day. Whenever I can, I always live up to #6 and love walking to some place I haven't walked yet in the city, and love waltzing right through Chinatown and the Hispanic communities to the south of the city in particular. And I always make efforts to talk to young people like myself about peace, and believe having peace projects in school classrooms as suggested in #46 is a wonderful way to broaden the virtues of peace and non-violence to our children, who will be the voice of tomorrow.



They also are currently promoting the Lick Global Warming Campaign, a project co-sponsored by the Dave Matthews Band (they have a yummy flavor called Magic Brownies that can make all the ants come marching and every Nancy dance, LOL!) and SaveOurEnvironment.org, which is calling for clean, renewable sources of energy, advocating for clean air standards in every state nationwide that could provide 20% of our electricity from clean sources by 2020, promote the Climate Stewardship Act to reduce global warming pollution, and strives to stop oil drilling in the Arctic National Wildlife Refuge, one of our nation's largest, pristine wilderness areas. All wonderful progressive values I stand for! :)



Here in Portland, every cone, cake, smoothie and sundae you buy goes to support New Avenues for Youth, LLC, a nonprofit organization that prevents homelessness among youth by immediately responding to their needs, engages homeless youth positively by building trust, stabilizes youth so they can begin to heal from abuse, and educates and train youth so they never have to return to the streets. With my Portland Ben & Jerry's being a PartnerShop, the scoop shop is used as a place to teach young people job and entrepreneurial skills, so that way not only can you enjoy the violent euphoria on your tongue, you also feel good spiritually knowing you're giving back to your community and making a difference, that you've taken part since 1997 in guiding 1,200 youth back into positive living situations and preventing even more from becoming homeless. :)



This frothy opportunity only comes once a year, so seize that good medicine, perhaps to try one of their new flavors of this year like Turtle Soup, Bananas On The Rum or Lemonade Sorbet, and also leave with a pat on your back knowing you're also sprinkling the world with a handful of altruism. :) What's not to like, what's not to like?



In honor of Free Cone Day, everyone will see me sported in my extra-special Cherry Garcia tie-dye, which I've only worn twice in the past year. :) Hey, that reminds me......where can I get one of those snazzy, voguish cow hats? Guess I'll come equipped in a waffle cone zoot suit! :)

XOXO,
Noah Eaton
(Mistletoe Angel)
(Emmanuel Endorphin)